10. How to know if You Have Adult ADHD
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Have you ever been walking through the mall,
making your way to the store to buy a new pair of shoes? Nothing flashy or expensive. You settle on a budget of $80, and that's final! Upon arriving at the shoe store, it's like walking into Wonka's chocolate factory. There are work boots and sneakers! High tops and Yeezy's! And even though there's a voice in the back of your mind saying, "Remember, you said you wouldn't spend too much money," after the 3rd or 4th reminder, your voice of reason becomes a whisper. The allure of something shiny and new quickly drowns it out. $220 later, $231 if you include the large pretzel sticks from Auntie Anne's with an extra container of icing on the side to keep the high of spontaneous consumerism simmering, because why not; you never feel full or satisfied.
It's not just the shoes. It could be habitually driving over the speed limit, forgetting to keep essential appointments, drinking too much, job hopping, smoking too much weed, playing too many video games, or having a tendency to say inappropriate things in public. I could make an entire episode with the list of ways ADHD can assist in inconveniencing your life. For time’s sake, the struggle is best summed up with the now infamous lyrics of R. Kelly, "my mind is telling me, no, but my body– my body is telling me yes." Sorry. Don't @ me.
People around you might call you unreliable, odd, disorganized, and smart but unfocused. After a while, anyone in that position who has a shred of self-awareness, or isn't a sociopath, may begin to question their competence. Like, "damn, am I a screw-up?"
Before anyone listening to or reading this jumps to conclusions, as those with neurodivergence can be predisposed, first, you should probably listen to this episode first.
How to tell if you might be experiencing the symptoms of ADHD and/or neurodivergence.
Impulsiveness
Disorganization
Poor time management
Trouble focusing
Trouble multitasking
Hyperactivity
Poor planning
Low frustration tolerance
Frequent mood swings
Not completing tasks
Bad Temper
Trouble Coping with stress
These are the 12 symptoms of ADHD. Looking at this list of symptoms with zero context, it's no wonder people think ADHD is bullshit. Who doesn't have trouble multitasking or has difficulty focusing sometimes? Even I, a person with neurodivergence, felt it all a bit suss' at first. "I have ADHD because I can't pay attention during math class?" Seems like a good excuse to sell snake oil. At what point do any of these symptoms become the reason for an ADHD diagnosis? I’ll tell you.
ADHD in General
In case you didn't know,
ADHD affects about 4% of the population. It’s a neurological difference (neurodivergence) that makes it difficult to sustain focus on specific tasks for extended periods. To read more about what ADHD is, click here. Everyone misplaces their keys, but to be considered neurodivergent, these symptoms must persist for longer than six months and likely will have been present since childhood. Not only that, but several symptoms would have to be present or have been.
From my experience, here’s a general life outline of someone with neurodivergence:
Elementary school is often easy, and kids with ADHD even excel here.
Problems emerge in middle school now that studying and homework are required.
College can be exciting because you can study what interests you, but the lack of enforced structure makes it harder to focus.
As an adult, committing to a desk job until retirement may be frightening. You can often be late or miss details. A big way people with ADHD accomplish tasks is to procrastinate until the last second to complete a project. This induces surges of adrenaline, which triggers a burst of productive energy and hyperfocus.
This can be an effective way of survival, but in the long run, it leads to adrenal fatigue, stubborn body fat, sleeplessness, low energy, hair loss, stress, and overall disease.
This doesn't include the less obvious byproducts: shame, low self-esteem, depression, etc.
As discussed in previous episodes, unchecked symptoms of ADHD can lead to jail, frequent auto accidents, joblessness, addiction, and more.
So what do you do if this sounds like I’m reading from your diary?
Knowing is Half the Battle
If this sounds like you, an evaluation couldn’t hurt. I’ve found many quick and helpful assessments online. They ask several multiple-choice questions and give a score at the end that helps determine the likelihood that someone has ADHD.
There's on the abundant website; I've developed it myself. It’s based on the actual test a doctor would give you in the office. It's still in beta, and I will be adding more features, but you can check it out now; I've added a link in the description; you can also simply visit www.abndtadhd.com. and click “ADHD Symptoms Quiz.”
If you think you have ADHD and want medical treatment, your doctor will likely refer you to a psychiatrist. From there, the psychiatrist will ask questions to evaluate you. Like any other condition, getting an early diagnosis is the key to successful treatment. Even if you don’t want to be medicated, there’s a wealth of advantages that come from defining what ails you and how to work with it.
Unlike many conditions, ADHD can’t be treated with antibiotics, x-rays, or stitches. A large part of overcoming a lack of focus is writing things down. And it’s hard to write things down when you don’t know what to write. That’s because you don’t know what you want. It sounds simple, but you should never underestimate the power of writing as I did.
For so long, I wandered through life, trying and failing. I could never get into a rhythm of consistently going to the gym, being hydrated, or doing my dishes. There’s no way in hell I was handling larger life responsibilities like saving money. I was told to write things down, but that only goes far. There are so many strategic planners available online, but most consist of endless pages of grid calendars and weekly spreadsheets. If you have ADHD, you’ll take one look at that and lose motivation.
I have so many hobbies, and they all seem so important I want to do them all. That’s why I made the YOU Testament. This workbook planner doesn’t have calendars or dates. Instead, it contains 21 exercises that will help you understand what you truly WANT to do, based on your deepest needs and goals. Then you can get one of those complicated worksheet planners that people with their shit together enjoy so much.
Much love!